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Can any one give me a better answer then it was gods will that my son passed away.Why would he hurt my family so bad.I ask god for a sing that he is with him and i get nothing.I go to sleep hopeing to dream about him and i get nothing.all i get is waking up in a cold sweat crying my eays out.For the last year in a half i slept in his room so i would hear him when he was haveing problems.WHY would he take my son and not give me the chance to save him or say good buy.Every one says that you just have to have faith.i am just about all out of faith. the only thing that keeps me from loseing it is Ethans brother and sister.this is not getting easier all i see is him in his bed gone and me not being able to get him back.DOES ANY ONE HAVE A BETTER ANSWER THEN YOU JUST HAVE TO HAVE FAITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I can only imagine the pain you are going through. Whenever I think of losing my child its a horrible thought. I have lost parents and grandparents during my life so far, so at least I have some understanding.

 

My belief, however, is like this, and this would be my focus in this event. I believe that God does not "take" our loved ones from us when they pass away, whatever the reason it happens. He also does not try to hurt us. Life occurrences are not controlled by him.

 

Regardless of what happens in your life, he looks for you to continue to be strong, to have faith, and to "follow his footsteps".

 

My advice is prayer. Continue to ask for his help and guidance, and continue to have faith. If you do so, someday you look back and realize that the death of your son, as horrible as it is, has made you a better and stronger person, and/or has resulted in some other good.

 

I hope this helps. I'll also pray for you and your family.

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Can any one give me a better answer then it was gods will that my son passed away.Why would he hurt my family so bad.I ask god for a sing that he is with him and i get nothing.I go to sleep hopeing to dream about him and i get nothing.all i get is waking up in a cold sweat crying my eays out.For the last year in a half i slept in his room so i would hear him when he was haveing problems.WHY would he take my son and not give me the chance to save him or say good buy.Every one says that you just have to have faith.i am just about all out of faith. the only thing that keeps me from loseing it is Ethans brother and sister.this is not getting easier all i see is him in his bed gone and me not being able to get him back.DOES ANY ONE HAVE A BETTER ANSWER THEN YOU JUST HAVE TO HAVE FAITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

My heart is absolutely breaking for you. There is nothing anyone can say. You are experiencing a very physical loss and your heart is responding accordingly. The words people say although well intention usually leave a sting behind because there is nothing that can take away the huge hole left by your sons passing.

 

As far as your faith is concerned, don't worry about losing it, God will hold onto it for you. Also God is big enough for you to bring Him all your pain, anger, grief, the WHY! WHY! WHY! questions you are going to have for a long while. Don't bother keeping it from Him, for He already knows your pain.

 

Your loss is unique and only those who have walked the path you are on can understand what it's like and but even now that would bring you maybe a small comfort. But do find those people, there are lots of support groups.

 

I'm praying God will give you a sign-So you can experience His peace the kind that surpasses all understanding. You too ask Him and He will do it, and you will know. I look forward to your sharing the sign He gives you. Until then assume your innocent boy is in Heaven, completely whole, Happy beyond words, and enjoying all God has for him. Your son longs for the day when the rest of you can experience all God has for each of you when you are again reunited. You see that's the hope our faith can rest on. If we are believers then although we loose loved ones in the physical we know one day we will be reunited in the spiritual.

 

Another thing it is not God's will that any perish. We live in a mean world at the present we don't have Christ as the undisputed King. I don't know why God doesn't heal everyone but this I know He is Good and Great, He sees, hears, and cares, even though you feel like He not.

 

Time-Lots of Time is needed before you will even begin to start feeling like you can go on and not feel the raw pain you are now experiencing. I pray many will keep you and your family in their prayers-

 

Most Sincerely

Tana~

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You'll be with him eventually. I know you will be strong for yourself and your family. You will always have his spirit and memories until you meet again. He just moved on, don't try to rationalize it because in life many things happen for reasons beyond our control and understanding. Life isn't fair, I know from experience but it does transform. The chair you sit on, the grass that grows, the electricity in our bodies, the universe is made up of atoms that have moved on and transformed. All of which are billions of years old, just transformed. You will be with him again and already are more than you think atm. Hang in there buddy and realize your family and your Shelby family love you and admire you for the strength you will show soon enough.

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Cardude,

 

The grieving process is long and normal. Your son had some very serious issues. Barbie and I have been close, we know what you were going through and how hard it was both emotioally and physically on you. He was hurting and as parents you did everything you could to help make it better. You and your wife must depend on each other and try to move forward for your other children now.

 

We don't know why these things happen in life, I have never been one to believe that god never puts anything on us we can't handle. Grief is part of healing and slowly it will get better. Ethan was a very special child, you and your family along with the medical staff did there very best, it was just his time to stop hurting and god called him home early. You will get a sign soon, I am sure. Don't put your faith aside, you need it more now than ever.

 

We are here for you. Take care my friend and god bless you and your family............

 

GG

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Can any one give me a better answer then it was gods will that my son passed away.Why would he hurt my family so bad.I ask god for a sing that he is with him and i get nothing.I go to sleep hopeing to dream about him and i get nothing.all i get is waking up in a cold sweat crying my eays out.For the last year in a half i slept in his room so i would hear him when he was haveing problems.WHY would he take my son and not give me the chance to save him or say good buy.Every one says that you just have to have faith.i am just about all out of faith. the only thing that keeps me from loseing it is Ethans brother and sister.this is not getting easier all i see is him in his bed gone and me not being able to get him back.DOES ANY ONE HAVE A BETTER ANSWER THEN YOU JUST HAVE TO HAVE FAITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

I am so sorry for you. I am going to school in the medical field, and one thing that I have learned is that the human body is made to work a certain way. I am not an Athiests,or a good speller for that matter.I do believe that the creation of life is a miracle itself. I hope that I will keep my faith when hard times come across my life. Sounds like you have two very good reasons to carry on. Hold on to Ethans bro and sis and cherish them. I am sure they are hurting and feel lost just as much as you do. Get together with them and laugh at the good times you all had with Ethan. More importantly, keep creating new ones so Ethan can smile while he looks down from the heavens, knowing that his family will never forget him, while continuing to make new happy memories. You and your family hang in there!

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Robert, you and your family continue to be in my prayers. I would love to be able to sit here and give you every answer you want, but I can't. There is some great advice here, I hope and pray that you will find the peace and see the reasons and gifts that God has for you. Take care my brother and if you need anything ask, if I can I will help.

 

Sincerely

Doug

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There really are no answers, only suggestions...

You will never get "OVER" this loss, only "PAST" it. You have your wife, and your other children who need you to be there for them.

You can/could no longer help Ethan, and g-d knew this, and took him from you. Always cherish his memory, for as long as you live, and use that positive energy to sustain yourself and your family in time of need.

Thats my suggestion...

Be well, and be strong.

GUS

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Robert,

 

You have my sincerest condolences on the loss of your son and at times like these, it is only natural to question one's faith in anything. My heart goes out to you and your family.

 

Years ago, here in our town, a family lost a daughter in a tragic automobile accident. Their daughter had indicated she wanted her organs donated in the event the worst happened, and in her case, her death gave a new life to at least six others. Her mother and father mourned the loss of their daughter, but turned her death into something very special - they became champions of organ donation and started a foundation in her memory to educate others. Today, The Katie Caples Foundation, (Link Here) regularly holds a "ride for life" to raise money to educate people and fund organ donation.

 

Only a suggestion from a total stranger, and hope I'm not out of line, but perhaps your healing can begin with something similar? I understand from reading about Ethan, that Camp Dream Street and Krewe de Camp were a joy to him, perhaps we (you and your Team Shelby friends) can put together a memorial cruise/gathering in his honor and donate funds to such a worthy cause?

 

One never knows how things will turn out, don't lose faith.

 

Sam

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Robert, to loose a child is not the normal way of life. We were not meant to outlive our children but sometimes this happens. As said, you will never get over Ehtan's loss, just past it. Let yourself grieve for him but do not forget that your wife and other children are grieving also. No need to be strong for them, just show them know that you are all grieving together and will lean on each other to get thru this. As for your faith in God, it is a bit shaken right now but He will help you and your family thru these times and still be there for you. I wouldn't question your faith, it is there if you are knowingdeep down that Ethan is happy, free from pain and always in your heart with you :-) You take care of yourself and your family and know that we are here for you. May your memories of Ethan help you to get by in these times of pain right now. It will get better, I know. Prayers for you and yours.

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Only a suggestion from a total stranger, and hope I'm not out of line, but perhaps your healing can begin with something similar? I understand from reading about Ethan, that Camp Dream Street and Krewe de Camp were a joy to him, perhaps we (you and your Team Shelby friends) can put together a memorial cruise/gathering in his honor and donate funds to such a worthy cause?

Sam

 

 

Maybe we can set up some type of sponser fund for a child in need to send him to one of these camps in Ethan's name.

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Only a suggestion from a total stranger, and hope I'm not out of line, but perhaps your healing can begin with something similar? I understand from reading about Ethan, that Camp Dream Street and Krewe de Camp were a joy to him, perhaps we (you and your Team Shelby friends) can put together a memorial cruise/gathering in his honor and donate funds to such a worthy cause?

 

All of the above really great suggestions and great starting point for when things settle down. Bravo! :sing_rain:

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Thanks to every one.Ethan was so happy when he went away to camp.I can not say enough good things about the two camps.Camp Dream Street is put on by the jewish community center.They have camps through out the United States.the children that attend dont pay for anything.All most all of the counselors at Dream Street were high school kids.the level of compassion and understanding they have is far beyond there age.They saw Ethan as a equal and from what the have told me he taught them so much.Krewe de Camp is a local camp.they have two camps one for kids with disabilites and one for adults wiyh disabilities.And know one pays for anything.This camp is run the same way all most all the counselors are high school kids (very special kids)they give up a week of there summer vacation to help out.Dream Street and Krewe de Camp are to very special camps and if any one would like to help them out please send a check to Camp Dream Street MS, 3863 Morrison Road,Utica MS, 39175(make checks payable to :URLCamp Dream Street) WWW.dreamstreetms.org or Krewe de Camp at FriendsHelping Kids,inc.

P.O. Box 1532,Mandeville, LA 70470. please put in memory of Ethan Bache.

 

Thank you

Robert

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Thanks to every one.Ethan was so happy when he went away to camp.I can not say enough good things about the two camps.Camp Dream Street is put on by the jewish community center.They have camps through out the United States.the children that attend dont pay for anything.All most all of the counselors at Dream Street were high school kids.the level of compassion and understanding they have is far beyond there age.They saw Ethan as a equal and from what the have told me he taught them so much.Krewe de Camp is a local camp.they have two camps one for kids with disabilites and one for adults wiyh disabilities.And know one pays for anything.This camp is run the same way all most all the counselors are high school kids (very special kids)they give up a week of there summer vacation to help out.Dream Street and Krewe de Camp are to very special camps and if any one would like to help them out please send a check to Camp Dream Street MS, 3863 Morrison Road,Utica MS, 39175(make checks payable to :URLCamp Dream Street) WWW.dreamstreetms.org or Krewe de Camp at FriendsHelping Kids,inc.

P.O. Box 1532,Mandeville, LA 70470. please put in memory of Ethan Bache.

 

Thank you

Robert

 

 

Sounds awesome Robert. Would you like us to mail donations to you so you and your family could go in person when you all are ready?

Edited by msmap
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My prayers are with you and your family.

Edited by stormeaston
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Sounds awesome Robert. Would you like us to mail donations to you so you and your family could go in person when you all are ready?

 

I think its better if you mail the checks to them.The people that run the camps know us very well they attended Ethan funeral.They are letting us know when people send money in Ethan name. Thanks

Edited by car dude
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I think its better if you mail the checks to them.The people that run the camps know us very well they attended Ethan funeral.They are letting us know when people send money in Ethan name. Thanks

 

 

 

 

Done Rob...Take care my friend.

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Can any one give me a better answer then it was gods will that my son passed away.Why would he hurt my family so bad.I ask god for a sing that he is with him and i get nothing.I go to sleep hopeing to dream about him and i get nothing.all i get is waking up in a cold sweat crying my eays out.For the last year in a half i slept in his room so i would hear him when he was haveing problems.WHY would he take my son and not give me the chance to save him or say good buy.Every one says that you just have to have faith.i am just about all out of faith. the only thing that keeps me from loseing it is Ethans brother and sister.this is not getting easier all i see is him in his bed gone and me not being able to get him back.DOES ANY ONE HAVE A BETTER ANSWER THEN YOU JUST HAVE TO HAVE FAITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

First i have to say i am so sorry for the loss of your child!!! when i lost my wife i realized that the only thing worse in my mind would have been to lose a child!!

 

It has been 2 yrs since i lost my wife and a not a day goes by that i dont think of her and grieve! I recently was advised to read a book about the life of a young boy and his journey! The title is "Heaven is for Real" this may or may not help you with your inner turmoil, it is great reading for anyone!!!! it helped me some and i am a firm believer and a practicing catholic!

 

I had asked my wife before she passed to send me a sign but it hasent happend yet! :( From April(2yr anniv.) i had been in a deep down hill spiral and then read the book and kind of woke up and started functioning again!!

 

Please try to function again and be there for your family, i just lost 4 months of my sons life because of this darkness!(zombie) God hasnt gave me an answer yet either or maybe he has an i havent seen and recocnized it yet!

 

Kinda the first step is recocnizing that you dont have the answers and then acting on it by reaching out to us through this forum, it is a form of self therapy and does help to let the steam out productivly!

 

No one is to blame! please dont beat yourself up so much! You stepped up when you needed to! you are one of the good ones!!!! God has a plan for all but we know not but what!!

 

This loss will forever define who you are, be strong for the young ones for they understand even less that you do! i have been told by 2 differnt couples that lost a child some of these words! The pain will diminish some over time but will always be in your heart just like your child!!!

 

I hope my ramblings in some way help you in your time of need and help you through your days ahead!

 

God is good!! let there be light in your eyes that you may see the good in all things! Amen! Jon

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Rob,

Faith is just that, faith that there is a better place waiting for us with an all loving God. God had a plan for Ethan. It is not for us to question or doubt why he took him when he did. He did not take him to hurt you or your family. This is where the faith comes in again, you have to trust in God.

 

I told you before I lost my son. It was tough and hardly a day goes by almost 30 years later that I don't think about him and what might have been. I am not bitter or angry. He endured a lot of pain and suffering in his short time here. I take solace in the fact that he is not longer in pain.

 

God blessed us with two wonderful daughters after his passing. We gave them our all and have two fine young ladies now. They ask about the brother they never met. I tell them they will meet him someday and he'll be proud of his little sisters.

 

Don't despair, you have a family that needs you to be strongand care for them.

 

ERIK

 

I'm sending a check to the camp this week in Ethan's name.

Edited by ejrail
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First i have to say i am so sorry for the loss of your child!!! when i lost my wife i realized that the only thing worse in my mind would have been to lose a child!!

 

It has been 2 yrs since i lost my wife and a not a day goes by that i dont think of her and grieve! I recently was advised to read a book about the life of a young boy and his journey! The title is "Heaven is for Real" this may or may not help you with your inner turmoil, it is great reading for anyone!!!! it helped me some and i am a firm believer and a practicing catholic!

 

I had asked my wife before she passed to send me a sign but it hasent happend yet! :( From April(2yr anniv.) i had been in a deep down hill spiral and then read the book and kind of woke up and started functioning again!!

 

Please try to function again and be there for your family, i just lost 4 months of my sons life because of this darkness!(zombie) God hasnt gave me an answer yet either or maybe he has an i havent seen and recocnized it yet!

 

Kinda the first step is recocnizing that you dont have the answers and then acting on it by reaching out to us through this forum, it is a form of self therapy and does help to let the steam out productivly!

 

No one is to blame! please dont beat yourself up so much! You stepped up when you needed to! you are one of the good ones!!!! God has a plan for all but we know not but what!!

 

This loss will forever define who you are, be strong for the young ones for they understand even less that you do! i have been told by 2 differnt couples that lost a child some of these words! The pain will diminish some over time but will always be in your heart just like your child!!!

 

I hope my ramblings in some way help you in your time of need and help you through your days ahead!

 

God is good!! let there be light in your eyes that you may see the good in all things! Amen! Jon

 

I guess you can say i am functioning i try and stay busy i went back to work and i try and not just sit around the house.I can for get about what happen for a short amout of time then it comes back with a vengeance.I really feel that he left us to soon.if i just would have heard him in the middle of the night i could have saved him.With the amount of pain and gulit that i feel a smill sign would help. I know i can not fix what happen i just really need a sign.

 

Rob,

Faith is just that, faith that there is a better place waiting for us with an all loving God. God had a plan for Ethan. It is not for us to question or doubt why he took him when he did. He did not take him to hurt you or your family. This is where the faith comes in again, you have to trust in God.

 

I told you before I lost my son. It was tough and hardly a day goes by almost 30 years later that I don't think about him and what might have been. I am not bitter or angry. He endured a lot of pain and suffering in his short time here. I take solace in the fact that he is not longer in pain.

 

God blessed us with two wonderful daughters after his passing. We gave them our all and have two fine young ladies now. They ask about the brother they never met. I tell them they will meet him someday and he'll be proud of his little sisters.

 

Don't despair, you have a family that needs you to be strongand care for them.

 

ERIK

 

I'm sending a check to the camp this week in Ethan's name.

 

Thank you Erik i am just haveing a lot of anger, and doubt .i know that i am in a really dark place right now and i dont see a way out of it right now.Like i said before leo,camille and my wife keep me from loseing it.they are haveing a hard time as well.They just dont know how bad i am feeling.they know that i am hurting and i tell them thats normal but i cant tell them everything that i am feeling.

 

Robert

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Robert,

 

I have been reading your posts for months long before Ethan passed away.

I really dont know what to say......my heart bleeds for you and your family.

I cant imagine your grief..........

 

And while questioning your faith is perfectly understandible........I urge you to realize that there are many folks who care about you,

to whom you are very important to, to whom your presence makes their lives better everyday......people you know.....and people you dont......

 

just remember that you are not alone......and that you have a profound positive impact on many peoples lives as you did for Ethan....

 

and as you will do for others sometime in the future.......

 

remember the good times and the blessings you have enjoyed....and will continue to enjoy........

 

we are a big family here at Team Shelby....and you should never feel alone.....

 

please take care,

 

michael

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Rob,

Faith is just that, faith that there is a better place waiting for us with an all loving God. God had a plan for Ethan. It is not for us to question or doubt why he took him when he did. He did not take him to hurt you or your family. This is where the faith comes in again, you have to trust in God.

 

I told you before I lost my son. It was tough and hardly a day goes by almost 30 years later that I don't think about him and what might have been. I am not bitter or angry. He endured a lot of pain and suffering in his short time here. I take solace in the fact that he is not longer in pain.

 

God blessed us with two wonderful daughters after his passing. We gave them our all and have two fine young ladies now. They ask about the brother they never met. I tell them they will meet him someday and he'll be proud of his little sisters.

 

Don't despair, you have a family that needs you to be strongand care for them.

 

ERIK

 

I'm sending a check to the camp this week in Ethan's name.

 

God Bless your encouragement for Rob-You have a special voice to add having gone through such a unimaginable tragedy. On a lighter not love your quote-Genius by birth-Slacker by choice. That could be my sons motto.

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Hi Car Dude, I am very sorry to hear about Ethan. I have been following this and your other thread for some time now and even attempted to post a couple of times but erased them after rereading them because I cannot pretend to know what you are going through. I have came close to losing my Wife on one occasion and losing my 4 yr old Son on another. I just felt I needed to post up after reading some of your recent post, because what you are feeling is normal and can get pretty deep and without help from friends and family can be really dark.

 

Now, so you know I am a Firefighter and have had many classes and training on stresses over things that I have seen and things I have to deal with in my line of work and one thing sticks out in my mind your grieving is normal and you CANNOT blame yourself for his passing. Those questions you are having is part of the grieving process "if only I was awake and heard him". I know there are no words or actions that can take away your pain in this time of hurt, so I will offer up something that may be able to help you understand the feelings and thoughts your having right now. This link http://grief.com/the-five-stages-of-grief/ will take you to a website about the five stages of grieving and please read through them and I hope it may help you understand the feelings you are having right now, they are completely normal after such a tragic loss.

 

Please if you find yourself in a dark place and feel like you have no where else to turn or just need someone whom you dont know to talk to and release some stresses or feeling that maybe you cant release around you family or people that that are close, call me (317) 366-9141 anytime night or day it doesnt matter. You have a huge family here on TS and we are here for you, so take full advantage of it. May the Lord Our God help your pain in this rough time. Have a Blessed Day, Greg.

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I guess you can say i am functioning i try and stay busy i went back to work and i try and not just sit around the house.I can for get about what happen for a short amout of time then it comes back with a vengeance.I really feel that he left us to soon.if i just would have heard him in the middle of the night i could have saved him.With the amount of pain and gulit that i feel a smill sign would help. I know i can not fix what happen i just really need a sign.

 

 

Thank you Erik i am just haveing a lot of anger, and doubt .i know that i am in a really dark place right now and i dont see a way out of it right now.Like i said before leo,camille and my wife keep me from loseing it.they are haveing a hard time as well.They just dont know how bad i am feeling.they know that i am hurting and i tell them thats normal but i cant tell them everything that i am feeling.

 

Robert

 

Robert-- You will never forget, dont even try! Half the battle is recognizing that your in a dark place that you dont want to be in and that is great! Dont bury your emotions and pain from them, they are hurting also! It really helps to find someone to open up to, be it a friend,family, or even a religious figure in your lives! If they have never lost some one and dont understand your pain thats ok, they are your sounding board, explain that you just need someone to listen with out trying to fix you! Your not broken! just in pain! Us guys have a hard time admiting/showing pain (crying is good!!!) Your not weak because you cry, it helps your heart heal!

 

This forum is a sounding board for you, Good for you for reaching out to us!! Your heart will forever have a hole in it, try to focus on the all the good times you shared with him!! Every thing you are feeling is NORMAL!! You are not alone! Everyone reading your chat is feeling your pain and praying for all of you! I hope that i am helping!! if you want to chat one on one and need a sounding board I am here! Jon

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God Bless your encouragement for Rob-You have a special voice to add having gone through such a unimaginable tragedy. On a lighter not love your quote-Genius by birth-Slacker by choice. That could be my sons motto.

 

Thanks. I guess being a child of the 60's, my quote it will always be part of me. I have quite a few personal mottos and daily goals. One is to bring a smile to somebody's face every day. If I can make them forget about their troubles, if even for a moment, it has been a worthwhile day. :salute:

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I guess you can say i am functioning i try and stay busy i went back to work and i try and not just sit around the house.I can for get about what happen for a short amout of time then it comes back with a vengeance.I really feel that he left us to soon.if i just would have heard him in the middle of the night i could have saved him.With the amount of pain and gulit that i feel a smill sign would help. I know i can not fix what happen i just really need a sign.

 

 

Thank you Erik i am just haveing a lot of anger, and doubt .i know that i am in a really dark place right now and i dont see a way out of it right now.Like i said before leo,camille and my wife keep me from loseing it.they are haveing a hard time as well.They just dont know how bad i am feeling.they know that i am hurting and i tell them thats normal but i cant tell them everything that i am feeling.

 

Robert

 

 

Robert,

I had to wait til today's pay check but I made a donation in Ethan's name on the Camp's web site.

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