What would you do?

[stwsam]

As I sit here in shock, and, realize no one is hurt or dying, I am trying to figure out the correct course of action to take towards my 13 year old son. He had a friend over, and, in front of mom, before she could respond, he said, I am going to let Kyle hear the Shelby revved up. Now he is allowed to warm up the automatic cars in the driveway, but never a manual shift. Apparently, he promptly started, and having no concept of finding neutral, he released the clutch. The GE is totaled, I have no idea how the front end looks, but, I do have the lower billet grill installed, or did, when I came to the office this morning.

 

When mom called, he was in the neighbors front yard shaking and crying, "dad is gonna' kill me."

 

Now I have ruled out beatings and other violence, so what should I do. I know what Jesus would do, he would sell the Shelby and contribute the proceeds to the poor. Good advice, but I will make that up on other efforts.

 

So, what would YOU do? I am finding this therapeutic before I go home and survey the damage.

[Michael Morris]

As I sit here in shock, and, realize no one is hurt or dying, I am trying to figure out the correct course of action to take towards my 13 year old son. He had a friend over, and, in front of mom, before she could respond, he said, I am going to let Kyle hear the Shelby revved up. Now he is allowed to warm up the automatic cars in the driveway, but never a manual shift. Apparently, he promptly started, and having no concept of finding neutral, he released the clutch. The GE is totaled, I have no idea how the front end looks, but, I do have the lower billet grill installed, or did, when I came to the office this morning.

 

When mom called, he was in the neighbors front yard shaking and crying, "dad is gonna' kill me."

 

Now I have ruled out beatings and other violence, so what should I do. I know what Jesus would do, he would sell the Shelby and contribute the proceeds to the poor. Good advice, but I will make that up on other efforts.

 

So, what would YOU do? I am finding this therapeutic before I go home and survey the damage.

 

1 teach him how to drive a stick shift

2 get him a lawn mower

3 start him a new buisness cutting lawns with all profit going to fixing your car.

michael morris

[AFBLUE]

If he's got a college fund, deduct the cost from his fund.

[stump_breaker]

WOW! :blink: That is though.

 

I agree with Mike. He needs to earn money somehow and pay for the damages. There needs to be a consequence for his actions.

The lawn mowing is a good idea.

 

Or, you can use this as a father and son thing. Get on his butt although by now he knows what he did is wrong and is scared to death, make him earn the money to pay you back for the repairs but if the damage is superficial - bumper, fascia, grill - you two work together to remove the old and replace the new. It will instill responsibility in him and pride in both of you. That is one of the good things about plastic. It's easily replaceable.

[mywickedshelby]

I hope you are kidding :huh: ...but in lew of that.....

 

calm restraint accompanied by a stern conversation regarding how dangerous automobiles are....

ESPECIALLY for those that dont know how to drive.

Moms & Dads make it look easy, but there is more to it than that, as evidensed by him being unaware the car would surge forward with a gear engaged.

LUCKILY no one was hurt, first your son, second a friend that could have been innocently standing in front of the car.

I want to say every kid "gets into" something like this between 13 & 15.....an ATV, lawn mower, Dads car, etc, and am fairly certain you can tell he will never forget how lucky he was today.

 

When I was 12, I was with my Dad visiting one of his friends. Playing outside with their kids, we went into the motorhome parked in the driveway.

I got behind the wheel & turned the key, trying to act like a bigshot cause the other kids were younger,

the motorhome lunged forward but I somehow knew to hit the brake and stopped inches from the garage......which was too low for the motorhome to enter & both would have been toast.

The ol man never found out, but you can bet I never forgot & check if a car is in gear everytime from that day on.

 

Having him earn the money back has merits, we are all resposible for what we do.

 

my .02

[tko211]

WOW!

 

I have a 13 year old son so It's easy for me to visualize what it might be like for myself in a situation like that. My heart goes out for your son... He HAS to know what the car means to you and obviously he is proud of it as well to want to show his friends how cool.

 

Well is sounds like you are obviously already in about as good a frame of mind as you can be all things considered. Clearly it was a mistake on his part and if he knows he can warm up the automatics then he most likely thought we was not too far from taking liberty to "warm up" the Shelby. He has to be scared sure, but moreover he has to feel really bad like he let you down or something.

 

I LOVED the suggestion earlier... I would go out of my way to order the parts myself and work on it together in the garage on saturdays. The opportunity to spend time with your son to "heal" your shelby together is a priceless moment that years from now when he is grown BOTH of you would cherrish for a lifetime. Selling the car (unless it is a lost cause) might send a message to your son that because he bruised the car it is now "ruined" and must be thrown out, leaving a deep long lasting regret in his heart. It might seem hard to see it now but I think a major teaching moment and opportunity to be the best dad in the world is at your door step.

 

Go home tonight, hug him, let him know that accidents happen and that a car is not as important as family. Then tell him that together you guys will find a way to pay for the parts and that together you guys will make her just like new again! I don't envy the dammage to your car but I envy this rare opportunity to teach your son and to make a life long memory!

 

Best of luck with your new project. I am sure it will work out just fine.

[timmyer]

All kids are different. Only you know if this is normal for your Son to do this. What I mean by normal is this..........If he consistantly does things such as cranking cars when he knows he is not suppose to be doing this than its partially your fault for leaving the keys were he had access to them. As someone else posted these things happen all the time in a young teenagers life. Luckily for all no one was hurt. Sad its your SGT........If this is not normal for him............He normally doesn't get in much trouble than I think he probably learned a very good lesson at your SGT's expense. If this is the case. Have a good talk with him, give him a hug and let him know you love HIM, not the car........

 

 

Do keep in mind this is coming from a 45 year old SGT owner who has no children..........LOL

[autoplay]

As I sit here in shock, and, realize no one is hurt or dying, I am trying to figure out the correct course of action to take towards my 13 year old son. He had a friend over, and, in front of mom, before she could respond, he said, I am going to let Kyle hear the Shelby revved up. Now he is allowed to warm up the automatic cars in the driveway, but never a manual shift. Apparently, he promptly started, and having no concept of finding neutral, he released the clutch. The GE is totaled, I have no idea how the front end looks, but, I do have the lower billet grill installed, or did, when I came to the office this morning.

 

When mom called, he was in the neighbors front yard shaking and crying, "dad is gonna' kill me."

 

Now I have ruled out beatings and other violence, so what should I do. I know what Jesus would do, he would sell the Shelby and contribute the proceeds to the poor. Good advice, but I will make that up on other efforts.

 

So, what would YOU do? I am finding this therapeutic before I go home and survey the damage.

 

 

I feel both parties are responsible,so,each party should split the costs of repairs.

You or your wife,let your kid in the past start up cars,and,your kid had access to the SHELBY car keys.

 

P.S. ... did he damage any beer in the fridge??

[stwsam]

I feel both parties are responsible,so,each party should split the costs of repairs.

You or your wife,let your kid in the past start up cars,and,your kid had access to the SHELBY car keys.

 

P.S. ... did he damage any beer in the fridge??

 

He also has access to alcohol, but does not drink it. He can also murder the cat and dogs, but does not. So, you do not learn responsiblity by being kept at bay from all dangers, at least not once you are learning to think. Nope, the parents are on top of right or wrong. A

 

As far as the lawn mower. Got it and he drives it well. As far as the project? Well two days ago, I took an F250 home from the shop that needed a front bumper replaced. I asked him to try and remove the old one by looking at the mounting holes on the new bumper. When I got home three hours later, not only was the old bumper off, the new one was on less four bolts he could not get in by himself. We finished it together.

 

I am afraid we are looking at paint, twisted hood, stripes on bumper and hood and more.

 

At the office we have about 1/2 acres of weeds,so , he is going to be living here for about a week and a half pulling by the roots.

 

So, let's keep up the thoughts, 'cause, I am still not feeling too good about this short of no one being hurt. That is the talk we just had, the other kid, or mom, or sisters or dogs could have been casualties. I do appreicate the feedback and I encourage you to keep it coming.

 

He has already posted a couple of tidbits on the site under my name without permission. That was given a cease and desist order about a month ago, but, he will be reading all of your thoughts.

[RogerS]

 

 

P.S. ... did he damage any beer in the fridge??

 

 

 

Only from you autoplay.

 

Glad no one was hurt! Some great advise posted. Seems like more damage than thought. Yup....he'll be mowing for some time. Earning is the way I would approach the situation. I'm sure you have had the responsiblity talk. I've done that many times with my 2 boys over the years. They turned out ok.

[07shelbygt]

Glad no one was hurt. Accidents happen. When I was in High School I wrecked one of my dad's brand new cars (200 miles). I am sure that no matter what you do, it won't be as bad as how your son feels. Sorry this happened.

 

Here is my advice. It is just my wife and I. I hide the keys to the Shelby GT and John Deere from her!

[csm198]

I have a different view on this subject. Since you asked here we go...

First you let him start the automatics right?

2. did you tell him not to start this car?

3. why were the keys in the car? (your just asking for it)

4. Your wife was present at the time?

 

Sounds to me like you and your wife are responsible for this horrible tradgety. Why should your son be culpable if you did not tell him you can start the autos but not this one? You also left the keys in the car.

It would be different if you told him not to and he did it anyway. Then I would agree with everyone else. Just be glad it can be fixed and keep the keys in a safe place in the future.

 

Sorry for your loss!

[sdear]

Being a mom of two very very very very veryyyyyyyyyyyyyyy difficult kids...not sure I am the best one to give advice....BUT....

 

the main thing here is to stress what "could have" happened to his friend or someone else in the path.......then come up with a plan to fix it together.

 

Sounds like a very "Shelby story" moment to me....that some day....he will post on these boards himself when he gets his own Shelby ( and it will bring tears to his eyes )

 

That is tough...my first instinct would be to hang him...then after I got over that...I guess you need to find many ways to help him pay for this. As a teen..i took my brother's 1971 Z28 out without permission..and a license..many many times...looking back I WAS NUTS . ( hence my love for fast cars ) My kids took my car many times without permission......and thank god nothing happened . But that was a different world....and just make sure he has consequences. No computer? No after school activities?

 

Like other posters said...let him know how important he is to you over the car...but then ...set the punishment. It sounds like he is a good kid otherwise....be thankful for that

 

Life's lessons sure can be tough.

 

Good luck.

Sue

[mrhugger]

Well....am happy no one was hurt...but I put the blame on the parents..to allow a 12 year old to start cars just because they are automatics is asking for problems. I recommend you consider the dangerous position you allowed your child to get into and realize how fortunate you are his friend was not between the shelby and the GE. Chalk it up to lessons learned....something like "son, this is my fault also. I should not have encouraged you to start cars". My opinion take it for what it is worth. Steve

[mmcgrath100]

Okay, so you aren't inclined to do violence . . . hire that job out then. Just joking. I'd give the boy up for adoption.

 

Seriously though, this is a good lesson for him and one that at least didn't completely total the car. To the extent there is an out-of-pocket cost, make him pay back a share of the costs in allowances until its done. And let him know now that in two or three years when he's ready to get his learner's permit, he's gonna have to work for it and he ain't going to be driving the Shelby again until he knows how to drive a stick.

 

Mike (in Portland)

[Glenn Greenwell]

Not to make light of your situation, my two cents worth:

 

I think you need to just chaulk this up to growing pains of having a teenager.

 

It only gets worse as they get older. You haven't even reached the age of superior intellegence (normally around age 16) for boys.

 

Most teenagers statitically will wreck a car within 6-12 months of their start of driving (yours is now out of the way).

 

Be thankful he wasn't hurt.

 

Put your wife on probation for allowing access to the keys

 

As always, just my thoughts :blink:

 

GG

 

A Quick afterthought:

 

It's okay to be PO'd thats a dad thing and Xhit Happens, that's life in the fast lane.

[sdear]

One positive thing..maybe this scares him soooooooo bad...that he won't ever consider something when he 's older that could get him in much more trouble !

[SWEDESHELBY1]

As I sit here in shock, and, realize no one is hurt or dying, I am trying to figure out the correct course of action to take towards my 13 year old son. He had a friend over, and, in front of mom, before she could respond, he said, I am going to let Kyle hear the Shelby revved up. Now he is allowed to warm up the automatic cars in the driveway, but never a manual shift. Apparently, he promptly started, and having no concept of finding neutral, he released the clutch. The GE is totaled, I have no idea how the front end looks, but, I do have the lower billet grill installed, or did, when I came to the office this morning.

 

When mom called, he was in the neighbors front yard shaking and crying, "dad is gonna' kill me."

 

Now I have ruled out beatings and other violence, so what should I do. I know what Jesus would do, he would sell the Shelby and contribute the proceeds to the poor. Good advice, but I will make that up on other efforts.

 

So, what would YOU do? I am finding this therapeutic before I go home and survey the damage.

 

 

He should have the following down:

 

1) I don;t think I could do this to my son BUT I'd be tempted to spank his butt with my hand. This would treat him with the respect he showed you by just starting your car without proper guidence. He showed NO respect to you or your wife by "just starting the car without permisson".

2) It is a hard decision to make because he is 13 years old, and 13 year olds aren't know for using their brains!

3) remeber what we were all like when we were 13, knew it all and could be told nothing!

 

Good luck and I'll pray for him!

[UltraStang#1]

First: Do you have any spare sons?

 

If you answer "Yes"......kill this one now.

 

If you answer "No".....well....<bleep>.....guess you have to do all the schmoopy things everyone here is telling you to do.

 

Neither of my sons gets into ANY of my cars without me being there in person. Especially my teenager. Having said that.....both can, and have, started my cars for me while I'm tuning them. That includes the race car which is worth more than any Shelby currently available today. I do trust them since I taught them what to do and what not to do inside a car. However, I do not trust anyone in my cars when I am not there to oversee things.

 

My suggestion? Ok..you asked. Teach him what to do in a manual transmission-equipped car. Then.....hide the keys. Oh yeah, give the wife a baseball bat so she can knock the snot out of him if he ever tries something like this again.

[stwsam]

First: Do you have any spare sons?

 

If you answer "Yes"......kill this one now.

 

If you answer "No".....well....<bleep>.....guess you have to do all the schmoopy things everyone here is telling you to do.

 

Neither of my sons gets into ANY of my cars without me being there in person. Especially my teenager. Having said that.....both can, and have, started my cars for me while I'm tuning them. That includes the race car which is worth more than any Shelby currently available today. I do trust them since I taught them what to do and what not to do inside a car. However, I do not trust anyone in my cars when I am not there to oversee things.

 

My suggestion? Ok..you asked. Teach him what to do in a manual transmission-equipped car. Then.....hide the keys. Oh yeah, give the wife a baseball bat so she can knock the snot out of him if he ever tries something like this again.

 

Maybe best laugh yet and .... good advice. We need a manual lesson!!

 

First: Do you have any spare sons?

 

If you answer "Yes"......kill this one now.

 

If you answer "No".....well....<bleep>.....guess you have to do all the schmoopy things everyone here is telling you to do.

 

Neither of my sons gets into ANY of my cars without me being there in person. Especially my teenager. Having said that.....both can, and have, started my cars for me while I'm tuning them. That includes the race car which is worth more than any Shelby currently available today. I do trust them since I taught them what to do and what not to do inside a car. However, I do not trust anyone in my cars when I am not there to oversee things.

 

My suggestion? Ok..you asked. Teach him what to do in a manual transmission-equipped car. Then.....hide the keys. Oh yeah, give the wife a baseball bat so she can knock the snot out of him if he ever tries something like this again.

 

 

 

Could I hit him with the fridge?

[stump_breaker]

So, are we going to get to see the car?

[mark1]

Since your son may read this, I say a good old fashioned whipping is in order.

Make sure not to leave any marks.

[ilmor]

Only you can decide what to do now, but my son or daughter would have never been allowed to start cars and have access to keys like that.

[pottydr_merged]

I think he was lucky the air bag didnt go off, p.s. hide the keys

[sdear]

I am anxiously waiting to hear if the son is alive...........and see pictures of the car.

 

 

I lovedddddddddd the spare son comment :D :D :P

[MattInDetroit]

Ok...could have been worse!

 

You could have been this guy on the first day he had the car!

 

 

 

Look, the message to give, somehow and there have been some great suggestions, that YES the car means a lot to you, but he means MORE.

 

I think he's learned his lesson...not much to do there...but you can reap BIG rewards later if handled right, that will be the bigger lesson for him.

 

Good luck!

[stwsam]

Ok...could have been worse!

 

You could have been this guy on the first day he had the car!

 

 

 

Look, the message to give, somehow and there have been some great suggestions, that YES the car means a lot to you, but he means MORE.

 

I think he's learned his lesson...not much to do there...but you can reap BIG rewards later if handled right, that will be the bigger lesson for him.

 

Good luck!

 

oh, the pain is not in the damaged car, it is the realization of the danger of impulsivness and when, the lesson will be painful enough, before, the lesson is too costly, and not in dollars!

[The Sheriff]

He also has access to alcohol, but does not drink it. He can also murder the cat and dogs, but does not. So, you do not learn responsiblity by being kept at bay from all dangers, at least not once you are learning to think. Nope, the parents are on top of right or wrong. A

 

As far as the lawn mower. Got it and he drives it well. As far as the project? Well two days ago, I took an F250 home from the shop that needed a front bumper replaced. I asked him to try and remove the old one by looking at the mounting holes on the new bumper. When I got home three hours later, not only was the old bumper off, the new one was on less four bolts he could not get in by himself. We finished it together.

 

I am afraid we are looking at paint, twisted hood, stripes on bumper and hood and more.

 

At the office we have about 1/2 acres of weeds,so , he is going to be living here for about a week and a half pulling by the roots.

 

So, let's keep up the thoughts, 'cause, I am still not feeling too good about this short of no one being hurt. That is the talk we just had, the other kid, or mom, or sisters or dogs could have been casualties. I do appreicate the feedback and I encourage you to keep it coming.

 

He has already posted a couple of tidbits on the site under my name without permission. That was given a cease and desist order about a month ago, but, he will be reading all of your thoughts.

 

First, thank God nobody got hurt. Next, phone the insurance company and tell them your wife tried to drive stick shift and this is what happened. Then look at the bright side....you will be getting a new hood scoop. :rolleyes:

[mccoystudio_merged]

First, thank God nobody got hurt. Next, phone the insurance company and tell them your wife tried to drive stick shift and this is what happened. Then look at the bright side....you will be getting a new hood scoop. :rolleyes:

 

 

Wow I was just lecturing my daughter about walking with a small stick by my car today.

 

I used to "borrow" my Dads car when starting when I was about 14-15 we would chalk the driveway and park it exactly where it was. He never found out. We would joy ride and listen to tunes and party....aaaaahhhh the old days before 1984, the mindset that is. Needless to say I now hide my shelby keys just in case anybody gets any ideas.

 

BTW first car I ever drove was in the 7th grade, my dad let me drive his 67 fastback gt home, I think he may had had a 3 beer lunch :D first turn had him reaching over cranking the wheel real fast so we got out of oncoming lane and missed the Mercedes coming head on for us...true story lol.

 

Good times...interestingly enough when I was 16 I rear ended a parked mustang fastback and had to go to the guys door and tell him....very very tough, moms car I was driving too, reached down to floor for a cassette. True story.

 

I think your kid will pay his own price in his head, but just think you got a servant until he moves out.

Hope it works out wow.

 

This is my first Mustang and I hope it never even gets a scratch :D

[CrazyDave_merged]

I have a 15 year old girl, and a 13 year old boy.

 

I told them I bought burial insurance on them. Enough said.